a bit about me, and friends

i think i sometimes tend to depersonalise my blog posts... very little day to day experiences... little opinions about things... just writing to amuse an audience almost...
well... still working on the story atm... but since the high from the macdemia latte had today at Gloria Jeans hasn't worn off... decide to mite as well post something in English.
Met up with Carrie 2day... after half a yr not seeing each other almost... did nothing except sitting around and talk... FELT SO GOOD! almost as if back to the good old girl-school days... cracking stupid girl school jokes...refer to ppl in nicknames only we know... laughing and getting annoyed abt sad non-descript guys who had been annoying... almost felt like i am young and energetic again for some reason... by swapping silly trivial complaints as jokes almost...
has also been able to tell her about some of the grievances haven't reali shared with ppl.. seems so natural that she is told abt them... not so much as in she is the only person i felt comfortable to tell... or after thinking abt it so many time now at that moment it bursted out... just a very natural thing for me to say, for her to listen...
discussed a bit about church issues... seems that both of us will need to pray more about them and wait for God's work.
i just feel that the tight screw i put on myself since start of this year in order of self-control has finally unwinded a bit... able to express my emotions and thoughts comfortably without worry of causing any distress by anger or sadness going disproportionate.
just also made me think how much i relied on the group of "US" for support during my weakest days... how much they made me happy... how much word they said that made me so touched that i had to choke back tears... how secure and content and grateful i feel everyday in their presence, almost like my family to me.
very different feel... like one supports and one unwinds.. but without either i won't do...
after all the hardest bits had been through in this one... knowing there r always friends i can fall back on, its about time i can allow myself to slowly unwind and not be so tense about controlling myself.
And worse things may befall in the future... i guess i am always going towards being a bit more brave, a bit more firm, have a bit more strength, and of course a bit more faithful to God.

(got the idea of saying what i reali feel rather than thinking wats the point telling ppl...... a bit influenced after a conversation i had last nite.... a usually happy person admitting that he is not happy about things... kind of a triggering factor...
決定今後不要畏頭縮腦﹐不喜歡就是不喜歡。)