funny quotes

2 quotes i saw today made me laugh:

1.爱情就像两个拉着橡皮筋的人，受伤的总是不愿意放手的那个.
Love is like 2 people holding an elastic band, the one who gets hurt is always the one who refuses to let go.

the next one is extremely funny...
2. 在此呼吁大家，学会修自己的笔记本……嗯，学会修自己的笔记本是很重要的……从前有个人，他不会修自己的笔记本……后来的事情大家都知道了
Here I am making a plea to everyone: learn to fix your laptop...yeh...to be able to fix your own laptop is very important...once upon a time there was a man, he didn't know how to fix his laptop...and we all know what happened after that.